There are numerous reasons why you might be looking for a church. You could be being a journey to explore the Christian faith. You might have recently moved, or maybe you are dissatisfied with the church you previously attended. Whatever the reason you are looking for a church, I would encourage to devote yourself to the search and then commit to the best church you find. God’s wants you to be involved in a local church: to build a community of love where you can be cared for, and where you can be serving others.
Finding a new church can be very challenging. There are no perfect church so there will always be trade-offs. If you feel completely lost and don’t have anyone to help you, drop me mail and I will reach out to my personal network to try and help.
In older times people didn’t choose a church. Geography determined what church you attended. The parish church was responsible for the spiritual needs of an area. The good thing about this was that you saw the people from your church everyday and could do “Life together”. The bad thing was when you didn’t get along / agree with the church you didn’t have an alternative. The lack of choice could be good because growth often comes through conflict.
Today, most people have the freedom to choose what church they will attend. It’s easy to approach selecting a church like a consumer, with a list of attributes that are desires such as worship style, a particular set of doctrines, a particular governance, and/or a specific program.
I would encourage people to think like an investor. Look for the place that God is calling you to serve. I Cor 12 and 14 talk about how we each have something to offer. Our lives, the church, and the world we live in is poorer when everyone doesn’t share what God has given them.
Discovering Churches
The first step in to find your church is to discover what are possible churches. In many locations there are more churches to consider than you would have time to explore. This means you need to find a way to narrow down the choices. In my experience, typical review sites like yelp, google, etc are not useful at all. There are several approaches that will improve the odds that you will find a church that is good for you.
Personal Referals
I have found a good starting point is asking people you know in the area for a recommendation. The person you ask should either know you well, or know the sort of church which has been a positive influence in your life.
If I don’t know someone in the area I am looking for a church, I will ask my trusted friends if there is anyone they know in the location I am looking in who could suggest a good church.
My list of recommended churches.
Known Associates, Denominations, Programs
Typically churches which are part of an associate or denomination have agreed to a common set of doctrines and practices. If you have appreciated a church that is part of one of these orginizations, you odds go up in finding a like minding program.
- Denominations which have strong cultures will produce churches that share many characteristics.
- Church associations which churches join will typically indicates some of the core values of the church.
- National or International programs which churches might host / sponsor / participate in that indicate something about a churches values.
- Parachurch organizations such as IVCF often produce a curated list of churches that they recommend to their members.
Identify What’s Right for Your Now
There are plenty of good reasons to change the church we attend. It could be that we have moved or have constrains which make our old church unworkable. It could be tha as you have grown and changes the church isn’t able to support you, or that your unique gifting might be most benefital to a different church.
Take some time to consider what you are looking for in a church. Don’t default to whatever is familur or comfortable. The “right” church for each of us will likely change as we growth and experiece different seasons of life. For example, some churches have an immersive community which is great for a college student or young adult, but is unsustainable for working parents of small children.
Churches, like people typically have strengths and weaknesses. If your strength and weaknesses are the same as the church you previously attended, it might be benefical to be at a church were your strengths help fill their weak spots, and where their strengths can help you strengthen where you are weak.
One word of caution. You might be attending a church that you are disatisfied with. It may be that God is calling you somewhere new… but please don’t take changing churches lightly. Be sure you aren’t running away from something God wants you to work through. If you are changing churches every year or so, the problem is likely you, not the church.
Preview Churches
Odds are there are several churches which pop up as “possible” churches for you to attend. One approach is to just start attending, and see where that takes you. This is perfectly reasonable approach. There is a lot you can learm when you attend a church that you can’t pick up on from written material or online resources.
Churches “About Us”
Most churches will have an “About Us” section on their webpage. This will include information about their leadership, beliefs, and whatever else the church wants people to know. Churches should be reasonably trasparent about money, so I would like to see something about what they are doing with the money they collect such as a summary of their budget.
For me, this information will typically not draw me to a church, but might throw a “red flag”, issues that are concerning which I would want to investigate in person.
Church Sermons
Most churches put their sermons online. Sidenote: some of my favorite sermons / podcasts. I find listening to how the church teaches the parable of prodigal gives me more insight into a church than reading it’s statement of faith or “principles”. Here is my rating system:
- Only talks about the prodigal son that leaves home for a sinful life who then returns home to his father. They are likely “religious” and judgmental. Completely uninterested in visiting.
- Talks about the prodigal sons, pointing out that the older son has as many issues as the younger son. They have likely been exposed to Tim Keller or Henri Nouwen writings. This sermon doesn’t draw me nor repel me.
- Talks about how the older son is the primary focus… the parable is asking “Will you celebrate/repent?”. Likely read Ken Bailey’s writings. Suggests that they are aware that church people tend toward being overly religious. Hopefully a place that not just teaches, but practices grace.
- The focus is on the Father’s heart. The party is for the Father, not the sons. Ah, they really understand!
Evaluating A Church
This is a huge topic which I will have to write up later. The things that are most important to me are captured in my post about church essentials. To summarize:
- God is the head, not human leaders
- Everyone is important and has a role
- Love, not religious judgement
Take Your Time
I generally recommend not to choose the first church you visit without visiting a few churches. I would encourage spending a few weeks at several different churches. Take to members. Attend a “welcome” or “orientation” meeting. If there isn’t one, request a meeting with someone from the church leadership who will spend time sharing their vision for the church and whom you could discuss the best way to get involved.
There are times when it’s clear to be a church is good, but not what is right for me in this season of life. In those cases I will note things that are great about them and then indicate I am looking for something a bit different. I will share what I am looking for. Mature leaders will respect your candor (and hopefully your encouraging words) and be able to suggest a church that could be a good match.
